I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
