Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
