I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Randomize
