dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize