I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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