You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Randomize
