Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
