we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
The adults are the big ones right?
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