i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
