i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Randomize
