Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
