I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
