new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Vodka?
Forever.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
