I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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