i think my tv is drunk
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Randomize
