Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
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