its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
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