yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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