Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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