Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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