That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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