hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
