Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
His hands were made for my vagina.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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