we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
