just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
