i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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