i already hear my dad disowning me
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize
