She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
