Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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