the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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