Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
