Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I can tuck mytits in my pants
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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