Whod you bang
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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