its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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