her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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