To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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