her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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