I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I'm like, not good at living.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
