he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
