It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
