Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
