Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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