We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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