Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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