Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize