I just saw a hot homeless man
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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