Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
