Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
