He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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