my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
